I Can Never Forget To Love You
by Pretty Pirate
Summary: DISCONTINUED. Post-Underworld. Emma & Co. saved Hook, but as always there is a price. To get back to the living world, Killian would have to lose every memory of Emma. His true love will become a complete stranger to him. Can their love survive this test?
1. Prologue

**A/N: Yeah, I know, I started a story earlier and left it hanging and now I'm starting another, despite pleading guilty that I am busy. Well, forgive me? *puppy face***

 **Probably will take time to update.**

 **Anyway, this is my take on a post-underworld possibility. Hope you enjoy!**

* * *

 **Prologue**

She had stood there numbly for a moment.

"Gone forever?" she repeated.

"Indeed." Hades had said, a bit impatient at how long she was taking to grasp the situation. "Though now, having half your heart, Mr Jones is perfectly fit to return to the living world, I must ask for a price in return. Alas, it is the truth of the world, magic always comes with a price. If Mr Jones is to leave the Underworld, he will lose every memory of you."

"But what good will it do for you?" Regina, being the most practical minded of the lot, had asked. Hades had chuckled at that. He had looked somewhat appreciatively at her, as if this was the very question he was waiting for, but looked at the couple in concern when he replied.

"You see, these true love perks are getting on my nerves. These two with their 'True Love' drama, they've cheated me out of a soul, shaken my ground. Though that _is_ commendable, and I let you go with a far subsidised deal for that, I can't give you a free passage after you just interfered and bent my rules. So I shake your ground - Ms Swan, you get to free your lover, but he loses every memory of you. The life you shared, the love you shared, it will be lost. You, of course, will remember; but to him, Emma Swan will be a stranger."

But of course, it was a small price to pay for Killian's life, and so they were soon exchanging tearful goodbyes as the portal opened, for everything was going to change.

"I promise you this, love," Killian had said, "whether or not I have my memories, I will never stop loving you. I can never forget to love you. You will never be alone, Emma, remember that."

She wanted to believe him, she really did, but as she saw him heading off towards the docks without as much as a second glance at her, whatever hopes she had began to flicker.

His promise hadn't been surety, it had been his hope, their hope. But how many times do hopes hold true in reality?

 _You will never be alone, Emma_

And yet, watching his silhouette slowly disappearing, she had to admit that she _was_ alone. Even Henry holding her hand or her mother putting a reassuring hand on her shoulder couldn't take away that dull ache.


	2. Chapter 1

**Hey Readers! Long time no see, I know... plz be patient for a while... I've got exams starting on the 1st of March till 21st... after that I might be a bit more regular...**

 **Killian's feelings will be clearer from next chapter... in this one it's mainly Emma...**

* * *

 **Chapter 1**

Once they returned the first thing he did was to return to his ship, not noticing her or sparing a second glance at her. She looked on, unable to understand what she should do or how she should be feeling. She swallowed, choking down tears, and tried to ignore the emptiness she felt. She couldn't help but realize, that Killian walking away to the docks might be - and probably is - him walking away from her life. She pushed away that thought, trying to hold on to hope.

Henry and the others then led her away, to the house that was supposed to be theirs, but still was just hers, she thought sadly. Henry offered to stay with her, and though she knew he probably would feel better back at Regina's, she didn't have enough strength to turn him down. With a flick of her wrist she arranged the bedrooms, at least made them livable, and both went quickly to sleep. This trip had been both physically and emotionally draining, especially for Emma.

It was the next morning that they interacted for the first time.

Apparently, there was an early morning mess at the docks, which had ended in a brawl between the pirate and a dwarf (Grumpy, naturally), both drunk. The two sheriffs had been called, and immediately headed there. After somehow pulling them off each other, David gave them both a good talking to and warned them against repeating what happened. Emma mostly stood on the sidelines, not wanting to put herself in a vulnerable position, just observing from afar whether and how much Hook had changed.

Despite her efforts to not grab the spotlight, Hook noticed her. A slow smirk formed on his lips as he edged towards her, checking her out.

"Hello beautiful," he flirted, smirking wide, "are you new here?"

She answered his smirk with one of her own. "No, I'm not. I'm here since before you came here. And just so you know, as long as I'm sheriff, flirting won't get you out of trouble, rather put you in more."

"Oh, I'll love being in _trouble_ if it's with you." he said suggestively.

Emma just raised an eyebrow. "Flattered." she said sarcastically, causing Hook to grin wider.

"How is it that I hadn't seen you till now?" he asked, genuinely curious.

"Perhaps you've just forgotten." she muttered to herself, but he heard her.

"Believe me, lass," he said in a low, seductive voice, leaning forward, and Emma had to struggle to remain unaffected, her heart beating faster. "it would be a bloody hard job to forget you." he winked.

Emma took a deep, calming breath, her gaze lowering from his eyes, before replying. "Then I guess we haven't met." she said, as coolly as she could. "Try to stay out of trouble, Hook. Wouldn't like to race halfway across town to break up a drunken brawl."

She turned and walked back to the car.

"I will try my best." he called after her. "But if it means seeing you again I perhaps wouldn't mind a bloodied nose." he added in an undertone.

Someone cleared their throat.

"And if I find you eyeing my daughter like that again I'll be the one to give you that bloodied nose." The sheriff - the other sheriff, David, he thought, was his name - said from beside him, the look on his face convincing Hook that he would carry out that threat if needed.

"Daughter?" he asked then, mildly surprised; he didn't look old enough to have a daughter as old as her, but then again, he thought, he didn't look three centuries old either, did he?

"The curse." David explained shortly. "Anyways, see you around, Hook. _And stay away from my daughter_." he added, reminded of the last time he had uttered those words and inwardly hoping, for Emma's sake, that he disobeys them again.

He raised an eyebrow, giving an amused chuckle.

"What were you saying to him?" Emma asked as David joined her in the car.

"Told him to stay away from you, or I'll punch him in the face." David briefed. Emma laughed. "Really?" she said incredulously.

David sighed. "Well, with his memories gone, it seems we are back to square one. He changed because of you, and now that he doesn't remember you, he doesn't remember himself either. I don't want him, as _Captain Hook_ , near you, especially..." he trailed off.

"Especially because I love him and he'll probably use that to his benefit?" she finished for him. "I know. That's why I think it's time to put my walls back up." she added simply.

David looked at her, half proud and half sad. "Emma - "

"Look, dad, I know what this situation is, and I know how to deal with it." she said, sounding more confident than she felt. "And things might not be great right now, but I believe in our love. Our love was strong enough to bring him back from the dead, I'm sure it will weather this storm as well. I'm sure that at the end of the day, he will come back for me, he will find me, no matter what."

David smiled and pulled her in for a hug. "My brave, strong daughter." he whispered, 'I'm proud of you."

"Thanks dad." Emma said, pulling away. "Let's go now, mom will be waiting at Granny's."

* * *

Emma sat in one of the booths at Granny's during her afternoon break, her parents in front of her and Henry beside, the latter chattering away about his day and other things, her father joining in occassionally. She wasn't stupid, she knew they were trying to distract her from Killian's absence, and she smiled, touched by their concern. Mary Margaret, however, didn't join in, but rather chose to observe Emma, occassionally smiling when she caught Emma glancing towards the counter, where Hook sat, a glass of beer in his hand, talking to Robin.

"You know, they _are_ working quite hard to keep up the conversation," she said to Emma, "you could just tell them you're not listening."

David and Henry broke off their conversation, looking at Mary Margaret, and then at Emma, whose face had reddened and gaze dropped to the table. She was blushing.

"What?" she said in a whisper, "Am I not allowed to look at my devilishly handsome boyfriend just because he's suffering from amnesia?"

David narrowed his eyes. "What's got you so cheered up?"

Emma smiled and motioned to her drink. "He sent it for me."

Mary Margaret nearly squealed. "He remembered?"

"I guess?" Emma said with a shrug. "I asked Ruby, she told me that he ordered it himself. He might have asked someone else though."

She sighed. "But frankly, I don't care. He reached out, at least. And if he is taking the time to find out my taste instead of ogling someone easier to get, I guess that is a good sign."

It was the optimistic view that she chose to take, and she knew that David kept himself from expressing the pessimistic one just for the sake of her happiness.

"That's the thing about True Love, there's never a dead end." Mary Margaret said brightly, being the ever optimist that she is.

She wanted to believe it, and was starting to, but Hook chose that moment to give her a reality check.

Her eyes fell on Hook again to find him leaning suggestively over the counter towards Ruby, saying something. Ruby brushed him off, shrugging apologetically at Emma despite not being at fault.

Emma stood up abruptly, smile long faded from her face. "I should go." her voice was cold, "there's lot of work at the station."

"I'm coming." David said, standing up as well.

Hook winked at her as she passed him, but she just ignored him.

"Hey, what's your name again?" Killian called after her, but Emma walked on.

She had barely reached her car when she was pulled back abruptly to find Hook's face inches away from hers.

"Hey!" David yelled, but Hook ignored him.

"I believe I asked for your name, love." he asked huskily. Emma pulled her arm out of his grip, taking a step back. David looked like he was about to interfere, but she signalled him not to.

"It's Swan. Emma Swan." she told him.

"Emma Swan..." he said in that husky tone, as if caressing the name. Emma nearly melted at that, but steeled herself reliving the heartbreaking realization that he really has forgotten her, forgotten to love her.

She took another step back. "Happy now?"

"Not quite," he said with a chuckle, "but you can make me..." he waggled his eyebrows.

She sighed. "I'll give you a suggestion. Find someone else." she said coldly and got into the car before he could say anything, David following suit.

She caught him looking at her with narrowed eyes, curiosity etched on his face, before she sped off.

* * *

Emma was going through the paperwork furiously. She didn't look up from her work even once, knowing that if she did, her thoughts will go to Killian, who had probably taked his advice by now and was seducing some other woman.

It wasn't that he had flirted with someobe else, no (though any woman who reciprocated will run the risk of being killed by the saviour); it was that had flirted with her, _just_ flirted, that she had indeed come to mean nothing to him. That she was just another pretty face, another girl he'll pass innuendos to, nothing more.

It was the realization that he had probably truly forgotten her.

* * *

"You don't have to stay here, you know." she mumbled awkwardly, "You can go back to Regina's, I won't mind. I know you're happier there."

Henry sighed. "Mom, I helped Killian choose this house, and it was never just for the two of you - it was for the three of us. I want to live here." He smiled, trying to lighten the mood. "Besides, my other mom already has her hands full with the baby and Roland. Don't know about anyone else, but I'd rather not wake up to a baby's wails."

Emma cracked a smile, and hugged Henry. "Thanks kid. I love you."

"I love you too, mom. It's good to have you back." he said.

"It's good to be back." she whispered back. "Just..." _Just that Killian wasn't here with her_.

"He'll come back too, mom. He'll be back before you know it, and we'll be a big happy family again." Henry said, as if reading her thoughts.

Emma sighed. "I hope you're right." She released him from the hug, blinking away the tears before they could fall. "Now let's get ourselves something to eat, you must be hungry."

"Starving." Henry said.

Dinner was quiet; Emma was in a brooding mood, and Henry decided not to push her further. She insisted he go sleep, that he needed the rest, while she did the dishes. Henry obeyed, sighing, knowing that it was no good trying to argue.

It was once she was alone that she let the facade drop, the tears fall, and as she finished the dishes in a hazy blur she realized that her face and the top of her t-shirt were drenched.

She found herself curled up on the sofa, her body quaking with silent sobs.

Of course, it was a small price to pay, a terribly small price for his life, but it didn't make her like it any more. It had been hardly a month ago that they had looked into each other's eyes and dreamt of a future, and now... now that future felt light a distant dream. Every time she felt that maybe it was finally over, maybe she'll finally wake up to that quiet life, or at least beside the man she loved in their dream house, and every time something happened that thre all her hopes out of the window.

She didn't know how long she spent like that, until suddenly there was a knock at the door and she jerked up, wiping at her face uselessly.

She opened the door and was met by Killian Jones, whose confusion was largely replaced by concern when his eyes met her red-rimmed ones.

Silently, he asked if he could come in, and silently, she invited him in.

 _At the end of the day, he will come back for me... he will find me, no matter what..._


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N: This one's a bit short. Don't kill me?**

* * *

 **Chapter 2**

They sat in silence as minutes passed by, Emma looking from the table to her own hands, and Killian shooting occassional glances at her, which she sensed but chose not to return.

"Why are _you_ upset?" Killian said at last, his voice quiet and exasperated.

Emma looked up, finally taking a look at his face. She furrowed her eyebrows, confused.

Killian sighed. "There's no need to pretend. I might have lost memory, but I'm not idiot enough not to realize it."

Emma let out a shaky laugh, at the sound of which Killian's lips curved up slightly.

"Doesn't help the cause either when most people in this town are being bloody obvious about it." he added.

"So," Emma said, her gaze wavering from his face again, "you know."

"I do, but it's what I don't know I'm more concerned about." he said. He leaned in, smirking slightly, "Tell me, lass, is my lack of memory the reason for your distress?"

Emma is momentarily caught by suprise at his perception, but regains composure within a fraction of a second. She waved it away with a scoff, "Not everything is about you, _pirate_."

"Hmm?" he said, smirk widening, an eyebrow shooting up in challenge, "But something tells me _this is_ about me."

"Really?" Emma said, scoffing, "And what exactly gave you that impression?"

"Well, for one, I find it unbelievable that after living here for quite sometime I wouldn't even meet you, the Sheriff _and_ the Saviour. A tiny brawl was all it took to draw you to the scene, so I can't believe we've never met before, especially given my actions during my early days here." Killian waved his hand in an offhand fashion, "That, coupled with the fact that I haven't lost _all_ memories but _specific_ ones, makes me believe that I've probably lost my memories of you."

Emma was again left dumbfounded by how much truth he had realized already. She smiled a bit uneasily. "Whoa." she said, "Not that I'm not happy to get the royal treatment, but didn't quite get how you joined those dots. That's a little too far-fetched."

He shrugged. "I've just got this gut feeling."

Emma nodded. She smirked up him then, joking, "Considered the possibility that I was the one that took your memories?"

He chuckled. "And why would you do that, lass?"

"Maybe to rid myself of your pestering presence?" she teased.

He raised an eyebrow, laughing shortly before shaking his head. "You're nowhere near cruel enough. And besides," he added coyly, "you enjoy my presence."

"I do not!" Emma protested, though she couldn't fight off a smile.

"Aye, you do, and you know it." Killian said, winking smugly.

Emma rolled her eyes but didn't respond, knowing very well she might just end up kissing him (which was certainly not at the top of her priority list).

"You never told me what was bothering you, Swan." he said after a moment, changing the topic, "Was I correct in assuming it was me?"

"No, you weren't." Emma replied, giving him a fake scowl, "Honestly, Hook, can you think about anything except yourself?"

"Oh, I assure you, I can." he murmured in a husky tone. Emma pointedly looked anywhere but at him. She could feel him grinning smugly.

He gave a brief chuckle, before rising to his feet. "Well, then, now that you're all cheered up, I'd better take your leave. After all, it is very bad form to be trespassing the residence of a beautiful lady like yourself in such late hours."

"Oh." Emma said, slightly disappointed.

"Look at that, Swan, you _do_ enjoy my company." he said, smirking. Emma made a face at him.

But as she closed the door and sat back down, Emma felt way better than she was feeling before he came. Somewhere between their light banter and his perception, she had realized that maybe there was hope after all, maybe they could start over and find love again.

That night Emma fell into a peaceful sleep, calmer than she had been since they returned, a flicker of hope lighting her up like a candle.


	4. Discontinuation Note

**Hey guys,**

 **Sorry to say I'm suffering from a major case of writer's block for this one. After trying and failing to write an update numerous times over the past month, I've decided to let it drop for now. Unless and until inspiration strikes suddenly, this fic is discontinued. Extremely sorry.**

 **My other fics will be continued and will likely get an update or two soon.**


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